Who is on your personal board of directors?

I was inspired by a conversation with my sister while we were away with our daughters during half term. She mentioned a recent discussion about her personal board of directors and was immediately taken with the concept.

“Who should be on it?” we wondered.

The obvious appointments came first: a family lawyer to help with wills, powers of attorney and the legal milestones that life inevitably brings; an accountant or pension specialist to support long-term financial planning. Then we stalled.

“What about an AI specialist?” I suggested.

The comment wasn’t quite as random as it sounded. I’ve recently been amazed by the range of AI tools I’ve used for both business and personal life. My sister, however, only heard “eye specialist”, prompting a wonderfully confused expression. “Isn’t that what opticians are for?” she replied, before we both dissolved into laughter.

The conversation stayed with me.

As I reflected, I realised I already have several people sitting around my own hypothetical boardroom table. The most prominent is my husband, who brings detail, perspective and an invaluable understanding of what makes me tick. I trust him completely and know he always has my best interests at heart.

Two close friends offer something equally valuable: honest, challenging conversations when I need them most. I’m also fortunate to know a qualified coach and GP who provides thoughtful guidance on far more than medical matters—not to be confused with my registered doctor.

Yet despite this, my board still feels incomplete.

Who else should have a seat? More importantly, which areas of life still lack representation?

Rather than specific job titles, I believe there are several types of people we should all have in our corner.

The first is the brutally honest person. This is someone willing to ask difficult questions, challenge your assumptions and deliver tough love when necessary. Equally important, they’re prepared to receive that same honesty in return.

Next comes the life-weathered mentor. Experience creates a perspective that can’t be learned from books or podcasts. Someone who has navigated setbacks, success and change often offers wisdom that’s impossible to replace.

Then there’s the person who genuinely understands you. Every one of us is different, and having someone with emotional intelligence who recognises your strengths, weaknesses and quirks can make better decisions feel much clearer.

Practical expertise matters too. Whether it’s a solicitor, accountant or financial adviser, everyone benefits from someone who understands the legal and financial realities of life—and can introduce trusted specialists when needed.

Finally, never underestimate the value of the friend who simply wants to meet for a coffee or head to the pub. These relationships often ask for nothing and give everything: companionship, perspective and the freedom to be yourself, whether life is going brilliantly or falling apart.

Of course, building a personal board isn’t just about who you invite. It’s also about who you don’t.

How do you know whether you’ve surrounded yourself with people who tell you what you want to hear?

Answering that question takes courage. It’s easy to justify someone’s place in our lives because they make us feel comfortable. The same dynamic exists in business, where leaders can unintentionally create echo chambers that discourage challenge and independent thinking.

A useful place to start is by examining motivation. Who contributes most to the relationship? Who challenges your thinking? Is anyone more invested in your image, status or success than your actual wellbeing?

These are what I think of as performance relationships—connections built around appearances rather than genuine care.

The evidence suggests this matters more than we might think. Findings from the Harvard Study of Adult Development indicate that poor-quality relationships don’t simply affect our happiness; they can also damage our physical health over time. In some cases, unhealthy relationships are more harmful than being alone.

Perhaps it’s time for a relationship audit.

Who deserves a seat on your personal board of directors, and why? Who brings wisdom, challenge, perspective and genuine support?

It isn’t always a comfortable exercise, but it can be an important one. If it helps you recognise relationships that no longer serve you—or appreciate those that truly do—the long-term rewards for your wellbeing and decision-making could be considerable.

Sources

• NIH (National Library of Medicine)
• Inc.

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